One of the fears that has plagued me since we lost our baby is that I would somehow forget that we had a baby. It’s hard to keep the memory going in your mind when the only piece of remembrance you have is a picture of a positive pregnancy test. Last Wednesday, before I miscarried, the doctor ordered an ultrasound. At that time, the baby was still there (though much smaller than he or she was supposed to be). All we could see was a small image that looked like a pea. But it was the cutest pea I have ever seen, and an image I have tried to burn into my memory. I thought about asking for a copy of the pictures, but I was too emotional and overwhelmed to comprehend much of what was going on.
Our First Baby
Two years ago I was diagnosed with something called endometriosis. While this condition can cause infertility, my doctor was optimistic that, with treatment, getting pregnant would not be a problem. So you can imagine the excitement we felt when on the morning of July 27 we saw the little blue line that told us we were pregnant!
Opting Out of Motherhood
Every so often an expert will show up on national television talking about the growing changes in cultural norms regarding motherhood and marriage. So it was no real surprise when I caught this segment on CBS’ Early Show last Saturday morning. The expert was a marriage, family, and child therapist, and she was brought in to discuss the growing fact that one in five women of childbearing age are now opting not to have children.