“O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you.”
What is your longing today? Maybe you are looking for a job and nothing is materializing. Maybe you have been trying to have children for months, or even years, and every month is a sad reminder that those dreams are not being realized. Or maybe you are hoping to be married someday and God has not brought that desired person along.
All of these longings, and any longing you are facing today, is not a surprise to God. He knows them all. God is not aloof and unaware of what we are experiencing. Rather he is in every detail of our lives. He is with every tear, every cry, and every desperate plea for him to move. He is there in every longing sustaining us every step of the way.
But sometimes this truth makes me ask “why”? If my longings are always before him and my sighing not hidden from him, then why does he not meet that longing? Why does it continue like a constant burden that I cannot lift on my own? But then again, why does he not fulfill the longings of hundreds of other people just like me? What I’ve learned in these last months is that maybe my greatest need is not having my greatest longing fulfilled, although I so desperately desire it to be met. But maybe my greatest need is more of Jesus, and it is through these longings I am getting the fulfillment of my greatest need.
Through this journey I’ve had a full range of emotions. It has not been easy at all. On this side of it I can honestly say that God has been good to me. He has not left me. He has made me love him more in my loss. He has never left me even in my days of deepest longing. I'm not saying it has been easy. But I know God's hand has guided me through even the darkest of times.
So wherever you are in your Christian walk today know this, dear Christian. Your longing is always before this sovereign, tender, and gracious Father. And even your most anguished sighing is not hidden from his loving gaze. He hears your cries and he cares.