So You're Married, Now What?

It’s that time of year again. Invitations are being stamped and sealed. Dresses are being sized. And women, young and old, are being showered with gifts in preparation for an all important day—their wedding day. Even the media is buzzing these days with the upcoming nuptials of Britain’s future King and Queen. We all have wedding fever and it is sure to last at least through the summer.

We spend a lot of time preparing for the big day. We buy a dress, choose bridesmaids, make a guest list, and hone a million other tiny details that will ensure our day is complete perfection. Now, I’m not going to lie, the wedding is a whole lot of fun. Or at least mine was. I loved my dress fittings, showers, and planning every detail. I especially loved the day itself. But for a lot of women that’s where the preparation ends. The clock strikes midnight and they realize they are left with a husband, not a room full of people dancing the night away.

By God’s grace, we were provided with excellent premarital counseling. We often talk about how much we were helped and prepared for marriage by the biblical wisdom and discipleship of the couple who counseled us. But no matter how much I knew the concepts about what it takes to make a godly marriage, those concepts didn’t always become a fast reality when we said “I do.”

It’s hard when two sinners covenant to embark on a life together. Some say their first year is a breeze. Ours was not so much. Sure we loved each other deeply and enjoyed each other’s company, but we didn’t really know how to put everything we had learned about marriage into practice. Sadly, I know for me, too many times I was just plain stubborn and self- seeking. I didn’t understand how to live as a help and support to my husband besides just cooking, cleaning, and making his lunches. It took me a long time to see that God created me exactly the way he did, and he had my husband in mind when he did it.

So how do we help young women prepare for marriage in a culture that prepares you for everything but “until death do us part”? God cares about marriage. And he delights in godly marriages showcasing his glory. Shouldn’t we, as believers, care a great deal about helping the women in our lives get ready for this great covenant relationship? It will be radical, that’s for sure. But one thing is certain, if we don’t then the world will.

That’s where I will be going with the next few posts. This doesn’t mean I’ve got the whole marriage thing down. I don’t. In fact, everything I say is because I learned it by doing it wrong first. What can I say, I’m a hands on learner. I do hope to elaborate further on things I’ve said previously about what it means to be a help to our husbands and the lies the world tells us about womanhood in marriage.

So stay tuned…